Some aspects of life are not like the clear black and white. And when it comes to different relationships, sometimes we may have to deal with unpleasant scenarios even when we are least responsible for it in the first place. The ego to prove ourselves right is very innate. But sometimes, for the sake of relationships, we have to deal with them differently and this may include apologizing. However, you don’t have to suck up everything just because the other party is adamant and stubborn. In fact, there are ways to apologize (or we would say, deal) even when you have done nothing wrong or you are least responsible for the problem, and in this post, we are going to discuss it.
1. If the atmosphere becomes heated, break the conversation and come back to it later
The emotion of anger usually blocks the part of the brain that is responsible for understanding other people’s perspectives. If you feel you are being wrongly accused of something by the other party, and if they are extremely angry or upset about it, it is best to avoid conversation at all costs.
There is no time frame (and neither any rewards) that you have to prove your “No mistake” whenever the other party confronts you. When the other individual is upset, they are usually not in the frame of mind to understand your perspective, let alone that you are not responsible in any manner for which they are angry.
Once the heat settles down, then bring the topic into conversation in a calm manner and softer tone.
2. Apologize out of courtesy if the other party undertook the wrong perception of your word, action or involvement
The hardest thing in the world is to decipher the intent of the individual. While you may have done nothing wrong; in fact, you may have gone out of your way to help the other party, which backfired, unfortunately, you can state an apology out of respect that they undertook the wrong perception.
Apologizing out of respect is a lot different than apologizing for a mistake. Take note of below examples to understand what we are trying to explain.
“I understand that you are upset but I was only trying to help you. I apologize if my effort made you angry. I will try my best to not let it happen again.”
3. Show sympathy for the trouble of other person
Showing empathy for the trouble of another person can also lower the tension between the two parties. Instead of trying to prove that you have no role in their misery, you can sympathize with the problem and offer a solution.
4. Ask yourself whether you are honestly not responsible for any of their problem?
While you may not have done anything wrong in your capacity, ask yourself, whether you could have avoided the trouble for the other party through your influence? If the answer to that question is yes, then let it out of your consciousness and give a sincere apology to the other party while also emphasizing that you did not commit the problem intentionally or from your own capacity.
Apologizing at Work when you have done nothing wrong
In a corporate environment, never ever take the blame for something if you are not responsible for it directly or indirectly. However, just because you don’t have to apologize doesn’t mean that you can show a lack of empathy and concern for the trouble that your colleague/ senior/ junior is going through. People usually do not like disagreement. They tend to dislike the tone behind the words.
It is also a good idea to state everything in written mail and to keep concerned people in the loop. In the written mail, you can say that you are deeply concerned about the trouble that they are going through, but you have no part in the process that caused the problem and that you only wish that their problem be solved.
Examples of Apologizing when you are not wrong
“I understand that you are upset but let me clarify that I have no role in the problem that you are facing. I just hope whatever be the problem is, it solves quickly.”
“I was trying to help you out but unfortunately it caused you more problem, for which I would like to apologize. While my actions indirectly may have caused you a problem, my intent was to help you out.”
Email Examples at Work for giving an apology even when you have no-fault
Respected Sir/ Madam
I have deeply understood the problem that you are facing and I would like to offer my heartfelt wishes that your concerns be solved soon. However, as can be checked from your end too, my involvement in this particular matter is absolutely nil, and therefore, I would request you to not assume me guilty of anything. My deepest wishes are with you so that your problem be solved sooner than later and if it’s possible, then I am willing to help you out so that more transparency can be brought into this matter which will help us to point out the exact party who is responsible for this particular mistake.
I hope you will understand my point of view and welcome more transparency to solve this particular matter.